What are peoples most embarrassing/ blonde/ senior moments?

One of my good traits (there aren't many) is being able to laugh and take the mick out of myself. So who would like to share theirs on here?

I've got two...one of them as i said it i though duh! as i said "Whats the point of a Scarecrow, what does it actually do?!"

Then another time, i'd driven from home to my mates house and when i was about to leave I couldn't find my car keys and I remembered putting them down on the table at home before I left so i convinced myself I'd left them at home, even ringing up my mum at home, not realsing i must have had them with me in order to get to my mates house! Again :Embarassed: :Laughing:

I am a bright person but those two things are pretty stoopid but like i said i am big enough to come and tell you guys about it.

On driving back from the airport after dropping my mum and dad off my 8yr old son (who is now 21 ) said ,dad where is the other Padgate ,why I said ,he replied the sign back there said PADGATE 2 so where is the other one




On the same day his other gran said to him where has you other gran gone on holiday ,his reply was CHICKEN ,when he really mean't TURKEY




I will now be enemy number 1 for posting it on here

Ok - my most embarrasing moment!!

B and Q Winwick with the wife and kids - we're walking in, you know, through those gates that open automatically and they have the two big TV screens up infront of you showing everyone coming in!!

Anyway, it's a Saturday, so it's packed!!

I think I'll show off to the kids, and decide to stand on the back of the trolley and scoot along, you know, like you do. Well, didn't quite work out like that - I went about 3 feet, then the trolley flipped up on it's back two wheels and handle, leaving me face down, star shapped on the floor, while the trolley shot across the floor and into the fire place display!!!!

Not only was it bad enough that around 100 people were stood there to see it happen, but it was caught on TV as well!!

My kids just stood and laughed, as did most of B & Q.......

i was reffing u 10s i think around 15 years ago, ince st bills v widnes st maries, ince had the ball in attack and in my opinion got the touchdown for a try so i pointed to the spot and awarded it. You cant give a try the maries kids cried out, nothing wrong with that i said its a try . 'but thats the 10 yard line sir!' whoops! play the ball 4th tackle. you could imagine the abuse off the widnes kids parents

I could turn this into 10 pages, easily, just naming stuff that's probably happened in the last month.

Goofball.

when i was a young whippersnapper i'd started seeing this girl,after a few weeks it was time to meet mum and dad,everything was going ok after the introductions and so on.after half an hour of idle chit chat i excused myself and went outside the back door for a cigarette to calm the nerves.whilst drawing on my cigarette i felt the urge to break wind,i did so,unfortunately extremely loudly.
cue my new girlfriends mother from the lounge
"i heard that"
walking back into the lounge was probably the most embarrassed i'd ever felt as i'd not even trumped in front of my girlfriend at that point.

That "new girlfriend/when a trump is acceptable" issue is quite difficult to judge isnt it. Almost as difficult to judge as when to attempt doing it up the wrongun.

whilst hoping she doesn't trump

Edited

I'm guessing my Wolfette won't own up to this one so I'll do it for her...

My mum was in the car on a motorway with her boss a few years back and he made an idle comment about the lorry in front being from the Czech Republic. She asked how he knew that and he nodded to the sticker on the back and said "CZ" ...to which my mum replied "how can you tell were he is from just because you can see his head?"

This place gets more like MSN or Facebook everyday.

Remember when jurassic park was in,
One of mi nephews got a dinasaour (figure) for christmas on the box it said "MADE WITH REAL DINASAOUR SKIN" my mum had been on the sherry so i said look at this mum dinasaour made with real dinasaour skin,so she stroked it and said OH yes it has hasnt it....When was the last time you stroked a dinasour mum..

Was in the Blue Lion in Newton a couple of weeks ago on a leaving do, and left about 10pm to get the train back to Warrington. Got to the station and the train was delayed, so waited for about 10 mins, then a train turned up. There was no announcement so just got on it, sat down and waited. After a while, I was thinking to myself that this journey was longer than I thought, so I got off at the next stop and ended up getting off at Wavertree Technology Park.

There was no trains back so had to wait for one to go to Lime Street, then go back to Warrington. By this time I was busting for a pish, so went looking around for a bush (there was no toilets). Found a perfect place, but before I took it out, I started trickling.



Ended up having a nice pish mark all the way down my leg. However, instead of fretting about it and hiding it, I just stayed around, got the train, got to LIme Street and then ended up waiting around for the next train back to Wire. Got a few funny looks but bizarrely I wasn't bothered. I was actually quite proud how straight the line was! Got on the train, put my feet up and was back in Warrington before you know it. Ended up getting home just before midnight.

I think I was more embarrassed at the last Cardiff Millenium Magic. One of the games had finished and everyone was walking out, I forgot my coat. I rushed back to get it, and I was rushing back to catch up with everyone, I turned a corner and went slap bang straight into Terry O'Connor. I brushed him down, straightened his tie and apologised profusely! He just laughed it off and strolled away into the vicinity of the commentary box!

Fare play to ya,for even admitting that.........................................................................You can get them incontinent pants ya know..

Well thats it for me this, Who should be a MOD process has gone right out the window
















[size=59Sorry Debs [/size

I can think of loads.

Getting my zip stuck in my foreskin springs to mind. I knew it was a problem instantly by the noise it made, I didn't just nick it, I zipped half my manhood up. I couldn't fix it, so shouted my Dad, he tried to coax it out, my Mum was viewing, for some reason, and I honestly don't know the reason why, we seemed to have a house full of people round, unless word just spread, I can recall my Grandad having a good gander. Various pairs of hands trying different ways, methods etc.

I was only about eight or nine (I swear it wasn't last week.), and at that age your not sort of, that aware of embarassment really, but I can recall not kinda being cool with my entire family staring at my widge. Anyhow, my Dad sorted it somehow, I avoided hospital, just a bit tender for a few days, just imagine a blood orange, same.

When i was in school i had to get the bus there and back, from town to sankey, and one time on the way home i realised i didnt have enough money so i just payed half the fair and thought id get away with it, since the bus was full of schoolies. However, when my 'stop' came about halfway to town. the driver pulled over, turned around and said "somebodys getting off here, who is it? Im not moving this bus untill they own up to it"
So theres me at the back trying not to look at him, glancing inocently out the window, and yet the bus driver continued to stare at everyone, so in the end i just got up and walked down the bus and straight out the door, with everyone staring at me, and an evil look off the driver, it was well embarrassing haha im never doing that again

I've got loads so I'll start with something small and recent.

Left pub on Saturday slightly tipsy after the match and went to Tesco to get some food. I bought a chicken wrap, a Diet Coke and a Twirl chocolate bar. Went to pay at the self serve checkout and got through scanning the first two items. When I scanned the Twirl, for some reason the screen flashed up 'Assistance Required.' At which point I held the chocolate bar in the air and said quite loudly; "Do I need ID to buy this?"

Mates didn't let me forget it the rest of the night.

Tripping over a Muslim/Sikh woman who was kneeling down in Alton Towers yesterday knocking us both over

Oh yeah i forgot one.

I walked into Mcdonalds and asked for a cheese & onion pasty, the woman just looked at me weird



Completely forgot where i was

KIN BELTER...

Snapped one of these once. Painful, and embarassing.

Maybe she was playing Hide & Sikh.

Some banjo strings are made to stretch...





Mi mate done his once blood everywhere i thought he had been slashed...

What do you call a Sikh in a night club, Dan Singh.

Hope you like these jokes, Amir all week.